Science can be a heavy topic. Whether you’re learning or teaching, all that deep thinking can sometimes give you a brain cramp! Thank goodness science can be pretty humorous too. Here are our favorite cheesy science jokes and funny puns to share with your students. These science jokes are just the formula you need for a few good laughs!
Jump to:
- How to Use Science Jokes in the Classroom
- Biology Jokes
- Chemistry Jokes
- Geology and Earth Science Jokes
- Physics Jokes
- Astronomy Jokes
- Weather and Climate Jokes
- Easy Science Jokes for Young Kids
- General Science Jokes
How to Use Science Jokes in the Classroom
Jokes are terrific for a laugh any time you need one, but you can actually work them into your classroom lessons and activities too:
- Bell Ringers: Start things off with a giggle before you settle down to the day’s learning.
- Brain Breaks: Give students a few minutes to relax and reset with a few themed jokes that match your learning topics.
- Icebreakers: Write jokes and answers on separate notecards, then pass them out so each student has one. Kids mix and mingle, trying to match the jokes and punchlines.
- Bulletin Boards: Fold sheets of paper in half, then write the joke on the outside and the punchline on the inside. Post them on the board, and kids can check them out when they need a pick-me-up.
- Extra Credit: See if kids are paying attention—try reusing a joke as an extra credit question on a test or quiz!
And now, check out the jokes!
Biology Jokes
Why did the germ cross the microscope?
To get to the other slide.
Two blood cells met and fell in love.
Alas, it was all in vein.
What do you call a biologist’s self-portrait?
A cell-fie.
What do phlebotomists say before they take your blood?
B positive!
What did the helpless T cell say when facing the infection?
“Is there antibody out there?”
Why do researchers look forward to Fridays?
They can wear genes to work.
Why did the physicist break up with the biologist?
There was no chemistry.
Why do plants hate algebra?
It gives them square roots.
Why did the mushroom get invited to all the parties?
Because he was a fungi.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
Why did the fish blush?
Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.
Why did the amoeba fail its math test?
Because it multiplied by dividing.
What did the femur say to the patella?
“I knee’d you!”
What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room?
The living room.
What’s a biologist’s favorite instrument?
A cell-o.
Why did the bacteria fail their math test?
They couldn’t multiply.
What did one DNA strand say to the other?
“Stop copying me!”
Why did the leaf say his friend should go to the doctor?
It was looking a little green.
How do mitochondria communicate with each other?
On their cell phones.
What do you call an organic compound with a bad attitude?
An a-mean-oh acid
What did the patella say to the femur?
“I knee-d you!”
Why do biologists like to travel?
It makes them more cultured.
How does a marine biologist end a conversation?
“Sea you later!”
Why was the cell sad?
His parents just split.
What do DNA strands shop for at the outlet mall?
Designer genes
Why did the biologist throw out his groceries?
They were past their cell-by date.
Looking for more biology jokes? Find our entire collection here!
Chemistry Jokes
What do protons and life coaches have in common?
They know how to stay positive.
Why is the pH of YouTube very stable?
Because it constantly buffers.
What do you call an acid with an attitude?
A-mean-oh acid.
Why are chemists great for solving problems?
They have all the solutions.
What did the scientist say to the chemist whose lab smelled like eggs?
“Sorry for your sulfur-ing.”
Where did the chemist have his lunch?
On a periodic table.
Why did the chemist hang up periodic table posters everywhere?
It made him feel like he was in his element.
Why is combining a proton and an electron to make a neutron so popular?
It’s free of charge.
What’s a pirate’s favorite element?
Aaaaargon.
Why do chemists love nitrates so much?
They’re cheaper than day rates.
What do you do with a dead chemist?
Barium.
Why do elements make terrible friends?
They’re always reacting.
Why are metals so calm?
They don’t easily get alloyed.
Why did sodium break up with chlorine?
Because it felt salty.
Why was the molecule so calm?
It was in a stable relationship.
What’s a chemist’s favorite plant?
An ele-mint.
Why don’t we ever gossip in chemistry class?
Too many reactions.
Want to hear a potassium joke?
K!
What did oxygen say to magnesium?
O-Mg!
What do you call a bunch of iron atoms at a carnival?
A ferrous wheel.
What type of fish is made of two sodium atoms?
2 Na.
What did the chemist say to his friend that lost an electron?
Are you positive?
How did the chemist know the book on helium was good?
She couldn’t put it down!
How does a chemist explain having a temper tantrum?
“Sorry, I just reached my boiling point.”
How did it go when oxygen went out with potassium?
It was OK.
Why did the attacking chemist army use acid?
To neutralize the enemy’s base.
Why do chemists find working with ammonia easy?
Because it’s pretty basic stuff.
Why wouldn’t the proton talk to the neutron?
He was mad atom.
What did the chemist say when asked if she was ready to go?
“I was boron ready.”
Love chemistry jokes? Get even more with our full list here!
Geology and Earth Science Jokes
What did one tectonic plate say when it bumped into another?
“Sorry, my fault!”
What did the limestone say to the geologist?
“Don’t take me for granite!”
Why don’t geologists like scary movies?
Because they’re petrified.
How do geologists ask each other out?
“Are you a carbon sample? Because I’d love to date you.”
What does a rock want to be when it grows up?
A little boulder.
What did the earthquake say to the volcano?
“You’re a hot mess!”
Why are mountains so funny?
Because they’re hill areas.
What’s a geologist’s favorite type of music?
Rock.
Why can’t you play hide-and-seek with a mountain?
It always peaks.
Why are geologists so calm?
They just take everything in strata.
What’s a geologist’s favorite snack?
Rock candy.
Why did the geologist quit his job?
The pressure was too much.
What kind of stories do rocks tell?
Bedtime stories.
What did the geologist say to their crush?
“Don’t go earth-quaking my heart.”
What do you call an Irish geologist?
A sham-rock expert.
Why did the glacier go to therapy?
It had a lot going on under the surface.
How do you know when a glacier is mad at you?
It gives you the cold shoulder.
What did one volcano say to the other?
“I lava you!”
What did the geologist detective say to his assistant?
“Sedimentary, my dear Watson.”
Physics Jokes
A group of protesters in front of a physics lab:
What do we want? Time travel! When do we want it? Irrelevant!
Since light travels faster than sound …
People may appear bright until you hear them speak.
Why does a burger have less energy than a steak?
A burger is in its ground state.
What did the proton say to the electron to start a fight?
“I’m sick of your negativity.”
How do photons get around?
They take the light rail.
What’s a physicist’s favorite amusement park ride?
The Gravitron.
How does the universe hold a party?
It invites all the stars.
What did the quantum physicist say to the stressed-out student?
“Don’t worry, it’s all relative.”
Why can’t physicists use the phone?
Because they can’t handle the static.
Why did the physicist bring a ladder to class?
To reach new heights in learning.
Why did the scientist put his money in the freezer?
He wanted cold hard cash.
What’s a physicist’s favorite meal?
Fission chips.
Why did Einstein hate playing hide-and-seek?
Because he was always relatively easy to find.
What sound does a subatomic duck make?
Quark.
Why did the photon say it was “just passing through”?
It was traveling light.
Why did the engineer break up with the physicist?
She just had too much potential energy.
Why did the nuclear physicist go to therapy?
He was having a meltdown.
Why did the tachyons break up?
They were moving too fast.
Why did the physicist like gravity so much?
It kept her grounded.
Astronomy Jokes
How do you throw a party in space?
You planet.
Why is the dieting advice to “eat light” so dangerous?
That’s how you become a black hole.
What kind of music do planets listen to?
Nep-tunes.
How did the moon know it was broke?
It was down to its last quarter.
What did Mars say to Saturn?
Give me a ring sometime!
Why did the astronaut break up with her boyfriend?
She needed some space.
Why won’t the Dog Star laugh at a joke?
It’s always Sirius.
How does the solar system hold up its pants?
With the asteroid belt.
Where do astronomers go for coffee?
Star-bucks.
What’s a light year?
The same as a regular year, but with fewer calories.
Where does an astronaut park a spaceship?
At a parking meteor.
What will you find at the center of Jupiter?
The letter “i”.
How is the moon like a dollar?
It has four quarters.
What do astronauts do when they’re sorry?
They Apollo-gize.
How do you get a baby astronaut to sleep?
You rocket.
What do squirrels eat in space?
Astro-nuts.
Why couldn’t the astronaut find space to land on the moon?
It was full.
Check out our full list of space jokes for laughs that are out of this world!
Weather and Climate Jokes
Why did the cloud date the fog?
Because he was so down to earth.
What is a tornado’s favorite game to play?
Twister.
Why don’t hurricanes see very well?
They only have one eye.
What falls but never hits the ground?
The temperature.
What happens when the fog finally lifts in southern California?
UCLA!
How does a thunderstorm catch fish?
With a lightning rod!
Why shouldn’t you fight with a cloud?
It will storm out on you.
Why did the weather ask for privacy?
It wanted to change.
What’s the difference between weather and climate?
You can’t weather a tree, but you can climate.
Why did the Earth break up with the sun?
It felt like things were heating up too quickly.
Check out our big list of weather jokes that are sure to make kids laugh, rain or shine!
Easy Science Jokes for Young Kids
How do you cut the ocean in half?
With a sea-saw.
What kind of dog loves science?
A Lab-rador retriever.
Why didn’t the skeleton go to the ball?
Because it had no body to go with.
What kind of hair do oceans have?
Wavy hair.
What kind of tree can fit into your hand?
A palm tree.
Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
He didn’t have the guts.
What did the science book say to the math book?
“You’ve got problems.”
What can run but cannot walk?
Water.
Why did the cow go to outer space?
To see the Milky Way.
Why did the sun go to school?
It wanted to get a little brighter.
General Science Jokes
What do computers like to eat?
Microchips.
What can run but cannot walk?
Water.
Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?
He wanted to win the no-bell prize.
Why didn’t the skeleton go to the ball?
Because it had no body to go with.
What kind of hair do oceans have?
Wavy hair.
What kind of tree can fit into your hand?
A palm tree.
Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
He didn’t have the guts.
What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder?
“You may have graduated, but I have more degrees.”
Which type of books are the hardest to get through?
Friction books.
How does a scientist freshen her breath?
With experi-mints.
What do you call it when your science teacher lowers your grade?
Bio-degraded.
Why can you never trust atoms?
They make up everything.
Why is the ocean so salty?
The land never waves back.
What did the science book say to the math book?
“You’ve got problems.”
Why did the scientist bring string to the lab?
To tie up some loose ends.
What do you get when you cross a scientist with a baker?
Mixed results.
Why did the scientist take up gardening?
They heard it was a matter of growth.
Why did the scientist break up with their telescope?
They just couldn’t see eye to eye.
How does the moon cut its hair?
Eclipse it.
Why did the robot go on vacation?
Because it needed to recharge its batteries.
Where do rich scientists work?
The lab of luxury!
Why do scientists love elevators?
They’re uplifting.
Where do scientists hang their Christmas ornaments?
On the chemis-tree!
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