If you told us last year we’d be sitting on our living room couch teaching our kids on Zoom; we would have laughed. Then came 2020. This year everything about how and where we taught was turned upside down. Instead of saying, “please be quiet,” we started saying, “please mute yourself.” “Sharing is caring” became “sharing isn’t caring!” And while it’s been a rollercoaster of highs and lows, we tried to find the humor in it all. Here are all the things teachers never said until 2020.
Classroom Management
“New rule, please wear a cover over your swimsuit when you get on Zoom!” —Ginger
“Do you think your dogs could go back somewhere else so you can concentrate?” —Misty
“Stop carving a pumpkin during the lesson.” —Carrie
“I am glad that you are paying attention, but you need to get out of the dog cage.” —Lauren
“Are you in the bathroom? Please don’t bring your iPad into the bathroom when we are in a Zoom meeting.” —Angie
“No, I don’t need to see you feed a mouse to your pet snake. This is English class, not Biology. Oh, this is really happening. Everyone get ready to write about this in your experience journal.” —Mindy
“Please stop eating your mask!” —Amanda
Classroom Community
“Sure, I’d love to talk to your little sister.” —Misty
“Yes, your horse can listen to the story, but he can’t stay for Math.” —Elizabeth
“Wow, you’re right! You do have a live turkey in your laundry room.” —Jennifer
“Please talk, to anyone, me, each other, about the lesson, the weather, anything, just speak! I beg you!” —Mike
“Raise your virtual hand.” —Laura
“Yes, you can take me on a virtual tour of your house.” —Matthew
Parent-Teacher Communication
“We already know mommy knows how to cut with scissors; we’d like to see you cutting the shapes.” —Edina
“I want you to tell me the answer; your mommy has already been to kindergarten.” — Susanne
“I’m sorry, mom, this is a test. Please have your son log in and take it himself.” —Rosalie
“Please tell your dad to put pants on.” —Brittany
“Can you please ask your aunt to turn off the GPS. What? You’re driving to Virginia?” —Debbie
“You cannot ask Alexa to solve your division problems on your graded assignment!” —Nicole
Technology
“You’re on mute.” —Every teacher.
“Please unmute yourselves.” —Every teacher.
“Please mute.” —Every teacher.
“Can anyone hear me?” —Every teacher.
“Is anyone there? Bueller? Bueller?” —Every teacher.
What did you never say until 2020? Share in the comments!
Plus, Teachers Share the Most Hilarious Kid-Invented Words They’ve Ever Heard.
