My mom and I both started public school when I was in fourth grade—I as a student and my mom as a teacher. I was over the moon about public school; I felt like I was finally the boss! A few weeks later, I discovered maybe I wasn’t the boss of this classroom. My fourth grade teacher and my mom had plenty to chat about regarding my, um, vibrant personality. And it wasn’t just her—my PE and art teachers were in on those chats too!
Now that I’m older and a mom myself, I see my own rambunctious, loud kiddo and think, “Yup, he’s definitely mine!”
Because I’ve been in a teacher’s shoes, I’m already breaking a sweat thinking about the lively talks I’ll probably have with his. It’s scary to consider, but I’ve already thought it:
My kid is “THAT” kid—what do I do?
I recently read this Reddit post from another teacher-mom with a spunky kiddo:
I teach 8th grade so I am beyond mortified that my kindergartner’s teacher sent me a message today explaining that my kid is a nightmare in class.
He tells her “no” to every instruction, throws a fit when he can’t use the color crayon he wants, and pulls the “I’m going to cry to get out of trouble” card. Of course, when we try to talk to him about it, all reports at home are that school is going great. We’re really big on respect at home. It’s all “yes, ma’am/sir” here. We explained that the teacher is the boss, etc. He’s been in 2 years of pre-K. School structure isn’t new to him. He has consistent behavioral consequences at home. I explained to the teacher our usual response to behavior corrections. They align to her classroom policies. I told her we fully support whatever behavioral management plan she wants to try.
What else can I do to help? There’s a reason I teach 8th. I couldn’t imagine dealing with 25 defiant mini humans that have near-zero reasoning skills. I don’t want her day to be any harder than it is.
Enjoy these heartfelt (and funny!) responses from the teachers below.
Being kind and understanding goes a long way
Yes! Emphatically, yes! Listening to the teacher without placing blame can speak volumes.
Stay on the same team
Teachers and parents should be on the same team. We can work together!
Don’t blame your parenting
Hold your head up high, teacher-parent. Your kiddo may just be expressing their values in a way they don’t know how to control yet!
A**hats often turn into wonderful grown-ups
Would you all believe my mom said the same thing about subbing for one of my classes? No worries, mom! I turned out OK LOL!
Thanks for partnering with us
Just be present. Believe your child’s teacher.
Just trying means a lot
This team effort will be successful and doable if teachers know they are on the same page as the parent.
Include the child in a meeting
I know teachers hate meetings, but maybe it wouldn’t hurt for your child to see that you are on the same page as their teacher.
How many apology notes did I have to write to my teacher? If I had a dollar …
Invite the teacher to dinner? 💀
I don’t know if this even happens anymore, but that probably would have straightened me out SO FAST in fourth grade!
Scrolling through all of these Reddit replies, it’s pretty clear that the majority of the teachers are grateful for the parent’s teammate attitude. Whether your kid is marching to their own beat or singing at the top of their lungs, it’s all about parents and teachers being in sync. And you can’t be in sync if the teacher is “the enemy” or if you think your child (or your parenting) is perfect.
You have a rambunctious kid, and that’s OK! After all, who knows? They might be using that energy right now to drive you bonkers, but maybe in 20 years they’ll be driving change in the world in a really meaningful way.
Here’s to embracing “THAT kid” in every classroom. Keep on rockin’ and rollin’, parents and teachers!