Everyone knows that standardized testing is the worst. It puts a huge amount of stress on students and a huge amount of work on administrators.
It also puts teachers in a mental environment akin to torture.
Think about it: usually when you’re bored you can call someone, use technology, doodle on a napkin, or slip into a daydream about getting stuck on an elevator with Benedict Cumberbatch.
But on standardized testing days, the only thing teachers can do is watch students take a test. Just think about that.
Because of this unique combination of stress and boredom, teachers go through a highly emotional journey comprising 10 distinctive stages. Allow me to enlighten you.
Stage 1: A False Sense of Excitement
There’s something at the beginning of the testing day about getting a bundle of thirty sharpened pencils and the knowledge that you’ll have to deal with fewer outbursts than normal that instills a false sense of well-being.
Stage 2: Waning Optimism
At this stage of standardized testing, the initial excitement takes a dramatic downturn anywhere between ten and thirty-five minutes in.
Stage 3: Eye-stabbing Boredom
This is the stage where teachers remember that they actually have to watch students take a test for the next several hours.
Stage 4: Panic
And this is the stage where teachers realize they are less than 40 minutes in.
Stage 5: Anger
Teachers usually start mentally drafting angry letters to their congressmen at this stage.
Stage 6: Determination
This is a particularly sad step in the standardized testing process, usually after lunch, when teachers begin to think they will actually make it.
Stage 7: Soul-crushing Despair
And then it hits them: they’re only halfway done.
Stage 8: Bargaining
In this stage teachers begin asking the “What if…” questions in order to escape the pain of proctoring a state test. What if I suddenly “remembered” I left the water running? What if I instantaneously developed a severe case of shingles?
Stage 9: Hope
And somehow, finally, impossibly, the clock shows that less than ten minutes remain.
Stage 10: Deliverance
For tips on how to stay sane and compliant during standardized testing, check out 17 Things You Can Do While Actively Monitoring!